Monday 12 April 2010

Jinxes and snot

Being prepared for an early morning start totally jinxed my morning. Before hitting the farter, I'd ironed a week's worth of shirts, laid out my riding gear in the bathroom (so I could get changed in the dark without waking anyone else up), packed my saddlebags with everything that I needed for riding into work - wallet, keys, security pass, sunglasses, phone, camera, bike camera, spare batteries and so on.

My alarm went off at 0600. I woke up feeling good, thinking I'd be on the road before sun-up.

Two minutes later, both the youngsters were awake. One made an attempt to go back to sleep on his own, but the other wanted me to give him a cuddle..... 30 minutes later, I woke up again, and so did he, and the whole morning went to crap from there. They wanted feeding, they wanted a book read to them, they wanted to watch TV, they didn't want daddy to go to work etc etc etc.

When I make no preparations and wake up late, none of this happens. See what becomes of being organised and thinking ahead?

So began another week of riding, and another lungfull of snot to discharge.

You know what jelly is like when it has been left in a cold fridge for a week? You know how it gets a really thick skin on it, which is inedible? That's the sort of thing that coated the back of my throat this morning. It was glued on tight, and refused to budge, even after much hacking and coughing. After one coughing spasm that resulted in me tearing a quadricept, a small pea-sized chunk of almost solid snot emerged. Finally, a breach! A few minutes later, another pea sixed chunk let go. And then a great sheet of jellied snot broke away from the back of my throat, and started flapping around like pyjamas on the washing line in a strong wind. I managed to get rid of that too - but it was more like a very large broad bean instead of a pea. Finally, I could start to breathe.

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